The inner dialogue: confessions of a Friday evening.
This postdoc's inner dialogue tends to be frenetic. "Was that 12 or 14 microliters? 12? no 14? How much did I add? ???? Sh*t forget it, its X.03mM instead of XmM" "Okay finish finish, Next Postdoc is signed up to start in the hood in ten minutes. Do all those cells really need to be split yet? Can all those cells be split in ten minutes? F*ck no way. So f*ck it, these cells will survive overgrowing better than those, so be it." "Ugh only halfway through the injections, ten more to go..." "F*cking A, the meeting with the Boss begins in three minutes, can I process three flowjo layouts in three minutes??" "F*ck f*ck F*CK"
And so on. There are calendars and to-do lists to remember, mice to take care of, experiments to design, papers to read, meetings to be gone to, socializing to be done and the special people to see and talk to. The average postdoc treadmill, and I love every minute of it-surfing deadlines, the pace, the multi-tasking, the nearly constant motion.
That said, the best inner dialogue is the silent one. It's 5.30 on Friday evening. The postdoc picks up all her detritus from the hood, puts it away. Mops up her bench, puts the media away. Sits down at her desk, collects all the little yellow stickies with cell counts, concentration calculations, dates of births and general experimental miscellanea and pastes them into the current lab notebook page. She looks at the calendar on the cork board in front of her, and everything is crossed out. The to-do list is similarly complete. All the mice are happily asleep or running around in their cages. The fluorescent lights hum, the lab is nearly empty, the radio plays on, for once not the driving rhythm of work but just music in the background. And the postdoc squirrels further into her chair and just listens to the sound of silence, the inner voice quiet.
Showing posts with label Postdoc. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Postdoc. Show all posts
Friday, October 26, 2007
Thursday, October 11, 2007
Good Times Bad Times
Inspired by one of Sunil's posts, at balancing life.
The key question is whether one can put a value on all the research that isn't published. Anyone who does research knows that there are good times and bad times, and that one has very little control over when those times occur. Postdocs need hot papers to get academic jobs-assuming, for the moment that we are talking about postdocs who want academic positions. Grad students would also like to publish high, but its less critical at that stage in one's career. It's usually the quality of one's postdoctoral work that is evaluated for jobs.
So what happens if one's well designed, innovative and technically superb project has no results? No publishable, sexy, revolutionary results? That the null hypothesis is true? It is extraordinarily difficult to publish negative results, especially since one can always encounter the ultimately dismissive critique that one hadn't tried everything yet. Does that mean that the two years spent on the project are toast? One's thought, analysis and expertise are worthless because they cannot be proved in print? Five more years as a postdoc?
So how then can we quantify effort and ability if not by publications? If its an especially technically difficult field, years of experience should count for a lot. If the idea behind the project is not mainstream (as Sunil discusses) and doesn't have any of the fashionably fund-able keywords, should one get points for risk-taking? The willingness to take on challenges without guarantees, at least the guarantees implied in "current-hot-topics" research, is uncommon and to be prized. So should CVs include a paragraph briefly describing one's project and the ideas behind it? Or will that just be seen as an attempt to flesh out the CV in the face of the conspicuous absences in the publications section? Probably.
After all new fields are created by people who can think out of the box. And sometimes luck only shows up late, and it takes three failed attempts to come up with truly revolutionary ideas. Or, the three failed attempts could reflect the complete absence of any BS-detector. Which is it? Does one always need to have a publishable side project, which will generate small reliable papers, thus demonstrating that one can actually do publishable research as well as study risky and unusual subjects? That one's out-there ideas are the product of intelligent thought, hopefully as demonstrated by the stuff that did get published.
Seriously though, is this a workable solution? Most postdocs I know do have two projects, just in case and to keep oneself occupied, particularly in immunology, where some experiments just take so long. Isn't it somewhat ridiculous to require people to have two projects? Or more?
Or, should one just ascribe it to the nature of the game, and let it go if things don't work out? After all, there are just way too few academic positions, and luck may just be another way to filter people out. Just because some intelligent and qualified people get thrown out with the bathwater, that doesn't mean that other equally intelligent and qualified people don't get lucky, publish and get academic positions. This way of thinking goes against everything I personally believe, because it just is not fair.
But who said life would be fair?
The key question is whether one can put a value on all the research that isn't published. Anyone who does research knows that there are good times and bad times, and that one has very little control over when those times occur. Postdocs need hot papers to get academic jobs-assuming, for the moment that we are talking about postdocs who want academic positions. Grad students would also like to publish high, but its less critical at that stage in one's career. It's usually the quality of one's postdoctoral work that is evaluated for jobs.
So what happens if one's well designed, innovative and technically superb project has no results? No publishable, sexy, revolutionary results? That the null hypothesis is true? It is extraordinarily difficult to publish negative results, especially since one can always encounter the ultimately dismissive critique that one hadn't tried everything yet. Does that mean that the two years spent on the project are toast? One's thought, analysis and expertise are worthless because they cannot be proved in print? Five more years as a postdoc?
So how then can we quantify effort and ability if not by publications? If its an especially technically difficult field, years of experience should count for a lot. If the idea behind the project is not mainstream (as Sunil discusses) and doesn't have any of the fashionably fund-able keywords, should one get points for risk-taking? The willingness to take on challenges without guarantees, at least the guarantees implied in "current-hot-topics" research, is uncommon and to be prized. So should CVs include a paragraph briefly describing one's project and the ideas behind it? Or will that just be seen as an attempt to flesh out the CV in the face of the conspicuous absences in the publications section? Probably.
After all new fields are created by people who can think out of the box. And sometimes luck only shows up late, and it takes three failed attempts to come up with truly revolutionary ideas. Or, the three failed attempts could reflect the complete absence of any BS-detector. Which is it? Does one always need to have a publishable side project, which will generate small reliable papers, thus demonstrating that one can actually do publishable research as well as study risky and unusual subjects? That one's out-there ideas are the product of intelligent thought, hopefully as demonstrated by the stuff that did get published.
Seriously though, is this a workable solution? Most postdocs I know do have two projects, just in case and to keep oneself occupied, particularly in immunology, where some experiments just take so long. Isn't it somewhat ridiculous to require people to have two projects? Or more?
Or, should one just ascribe it to the nature of the game, and let it go if things don't work out? After all, there are just way too few academic positions, and luck may just be another way to filter people out. Just because some intelligent and qualified people get thrown out with the bathwater, that doesn't mean that other equally intelligent and qualified people don't get lucky, publish and get academic positions. This way of thinking goes against everything I personally believe, because it just is not fair.
But who said life would be fair?
Friday, October 5, 2007
What is and What Should Never Be
Will asking postdoc mentors to document their mentoring help the current mentoring-or-lack-thereof situation?
I don't know, seems like yet another opportunity to write things in a grant proposal that you don't necessarily mean to do. More verbal padding, more watchwords. On the other hand, writing the watchwords may start you think about them. Will it change what is, and what should never be, or have been for that matter?
Hm.
I don't know, seems like yet another opportunity to write things in a grant proposal that you don't necessarily mean to do. More verbal padding, more watchwords. On the other hand, writing the watchwords may start you think about them. Will it change what is, and what should never be, or have been for that matter?
Hm.
Wednesday, October 3, 2007
No Quarter
(Persevering with the Led Zeppelin theme)
Can you succeed in academia only if you are a shark?
This is something I started to think about when I came to the USA. In India, in my experience, academic scientists are idealistic, workaholic, fatalistic and gossipy. Money is always tight and you rarely get to publish in the good journals (and I'm not talking only about the big three or five) because of where you're from. The salaries for PI-level scientists are nowhere as high as they are here, and respect from the public and one's peers in other countries can be in short supply. The keen-edged aggression that one sees among scientists (specifically, biologists) here is not at all common. But, and this is crucial, once you enter the system of government science labs, you will have a career. Every X years you will be promoted, every Y years you will get a salary. You have tons of holidays, your kids have opportunities. Many post-postdoctoral scientists I know in India have jobs and some measure of security.
Many things are common between the scientific world in India and the United States, the most glaring absence in the latter is the absence of any prospects of security in academia until you have tenure. So the situation is then that you have really bright people who work and work and work, with limited pay and even more limited prospects. To make things more interesting, these people are often enormously motivated and justly ambitious: So where does all the energy go?
We all know there aren't enough PI positions. There aren't very many non-PI permanent researcher positions either. So the only thing to do then is to fight for the positions there are, right? To give no quarter, to your peers, to the possibility of failure, to your life, or to yourself. To be aggressive and up-to-date, to work harder, better and more successfully than everyone else. To know things and have connections that others don't have. Not that there is anything wrong with any of these things, I get a buzz out of the hunt just as much as anyone. My point is that it is not really sustainable.
Or not sustainable for the majority anyway. what happens to the people who cannot, do not want to or will not be sharks? The laws of luck and averages dictate that some such will succeed in academia, but in the balance I think the sharks don't succeed. Then you have a situation in which the system "selects" for the most aggressive people, and often does not encourage other more nurturing or considerate professional behaviour. The lack of consideration and sensitivity, coupled with a reluctance to show "mommy qualities" because that would invite professional ridicule, leads to bosses who demand and do not teach, who hector not mentor, and whose personal advancement is their primary goal.
Shark eat shark then. Which doesn't seem like much fun to me, and maybe to more people. Why is it that the system is ok with people who are excellent scientists but dreadful people? Why is that acceptable? I don't know. However I do see some incremental changes (not where I work at, but), and I think the key to any improvements in the system can only occur with recognition of these issues. I hope so, because the joy of research is being subsumed by the nastiness of its execution.
Can you succeed in academia only if you are a shark?
This is something I started to think about when I came to the USA. In India, in my experience, academic scientists are idealistic, workaholic, fatalistic and gossipy. Money is always tight and you rarely get to publish in the good journals (and I'm not talking only about the big three or five) because of where you're from. The salaries for PI-level scientists are nowhere as high as they are here, and respect from the public and one's peers in other countries can be in short supply. The keen-edged aggression that one sees among scientists (specifically, biologists) here is not at all common. But, and this is crucial, once you enter the system of government science labs, you will have a career. Every X years you will be promoted, every Y years you will get a salary. You have tons of holidays, your kids have opportunities. Many post-postdoctoral scientists I know in India have jobs and some measure of security.
Many things are common between the scientific world in India and the United States, the most glaring absence in the latter is the absence of any prospects of security in academia until you have tenure. So the situation is then that you have really bright people who work and work and work, with limited pay and even more limited prospects. To make things more interesting, these people are often enormously motivated and justly ambitious: So where does all the energy go?
We all know there aren't enough PI positions. There aren't very many non-PI permanent researcher positions either. So the only thing to do then is to fight for the positions there are, right? To give no quarter, to your peers, to the possibility of failure, to your life, or to yourself. To be aggressive and up-to-date, to work harder, better and more successfully than everyone else. To know things and have connections that others don't have. Not that there is anything wrong with any of these things, I get a buzz out of the hunt just as much as anyone. My point is that it is not really sustainable.
Or not sustainable for the majority anyway. what happens to the people who cannot, do not want to or will not be sharks? The laws of luck and averages dictate that some such will succeed in academia, but in the balance I think the sharks don't succeed. Then you have a situation in which the system "selects" for the most aggressive people, and often does not encourage other more nurturing or considerate professional behaviour. The lack of consideration and sensitivity, coupled with a reluctance to show "mommy qualities" because that would invite professional ridicule, leads to bosses who demand and do not teach, who hector not mentor, and whose personal advancement is their primary goal.
Shark eat shark then. Which doesn't seem like much fun to me, and maybe to more people. Why is it that the system is ok with people who are excellent scientists but dreadful people? Why is that acceptable? I don't know. However I do see some incremental changes (not where I work at, but), and I think the key to any improvements in the system can only occur with recognition of these issues. I hope so, because the joy of research is being subsumed by the nastiness of its execution.
Tuesday, September 25, 2007
Communication Breakdown
I'm having some writer's block, partly because I have resolved not to complain and partly because the postdoc work curve is on the upswing. Up up towards the ceiling, a good thing overall except for the constant ambivalence towards said work.
Anyway, to make this more fun, October is Led Zeppelin song titles month. I'm going post with Led Zeppelin song titles and incorporate the title into the post. It should serve to repair the communication breakdown (see?) of this past month. Oh, and did I mention that the posts will continue to be about postdoc-ing and Immunology? Let's see how it goes-I see vistas opening up. No quarter, Over the hills and far away, Rambling on, the Battle of Evermore... If you have a song you'd like to challenge me with, go ahead, leave me a comment.
So the major work upswing has been because my boss and I have somehow resolved a major communication breakdown. I have been miserable here because I have been feeling underappreciated and fundamentally not respected. By my boss. Also, said boss has also been dismissive of my ideas and has not been receptive to me branching off on my own or following my instinctive interests, which are in infectious diseases and has been pushing me to work on boss's own interests, which are classical and molecular.
Suddenly boss is listening to me. And seems ok with, even very mildly encouraging of my pursuing something at the juncture of infectious disease and classical immunology. Not too much improvement in the overt respect and appreciation department, but that may be a function of temperament. I am flabbergasted, and thrilled! It's a little sad what I consider an improvement, given the aforementioned lack or R&A. But I'll take anything!
What caused this? Is it because I stood up for myself? Mildly and politely, but I did. Is it because I was direct and stated (repeatedly) that while all the classical stuff was all very well but since it is the boss's thing I couldn't possibly take it with me to start my own lab (if and when)? Because I said that I was interested in this and would like to take it with me? Because what I am suggesting will be a hot thing to put in grants? Because the boss is happier with life and therefore finds it easier to interact with us?
A combination of these I think, with grants and mood probably higher on the list than the rest. Food for thought, complaining does not achieve much, communicating does. Hm.
Onwards...
Anyway, to make this more fun, October is Led Zeppelin song titles month. I'm going post with Led Zeppelin song titles and incorporate the title into the post. It should serve to repair the communication breakdown (see?) of this past month. Oh, and did I mention that the posts will continue to be about postdoc-ing and Immunology? Let's see how it goes-I see vistas opening up. No quarter, Over the hills and far away, Rambling on, the Battle of Evermore... If you have a song you'd like to challenge me with, go ahead, leave me a comment.
So the major work upswing has been because my boss and I have somehow resolved a major communication breakdown. I have been miserable here because I have been feeling underappreciated and fundamentally not respected. By my boss. Also, said boss has also been dismissive of my ideas and has not been receptive to me branching off on my own or following my instinctive interests, which are in infectious diseases and has been pushing me to work on boss's own interests, which are classical and molecular.
Suddenly boss is listening to me. And seems ok with, even very mildly encouraging of my pursuing something at the juncture of infectious disease and classical immunology. Not too much improvement in the overt respect and appreciation department, but that may be a function of temperament. I am flabbergasted, and thrilled! It's a little sad what I consider an improvement, given the aforementioned lack or R&A. But I'll take anything!
What caused this? Is it because I stood up for myself? Mildly and politely, but I did. Is it because I was direct and stated (repeatedly) that while all the classical stuff was all very well but since it is the boss's thing I couldn't possibly take it with me to start my own lab (if and when)? Because I said that I was interested in this and would like to take it with me? Because what I am suggesting will be a hot thing to put in grants? Because the boss is happier with life and therefore finds it easier to interact with us?
A combination of these I think, with grants and mood probably higher on the list than the rest. Food for thought, complaining does not achieve much, communicating does. Hm.
Onwards...
Thursday, August 23, 2007
Postdoc Carnival: What's up Postdoc? August 23rd
Hello everyone,
It's always a joy to host a carnival where you read things written by your peers that are so insightful, truthful and enjoyable. Thank you everyone who wrote to me with posts and those who suggested posts, and without any further ado, the carnival.
Regrets Regrets
I wanted to know what all of you would have done differently if you could, and the spectrum of answers was fascinating. Dr. Brazen Hussy wouldn't change a thing, barring the occasional drunken quarrels with her advisor. Day by Day wouldn't change much either in the balance, she regrets only not spending enough time with her friends from grad school. Lou proposes that we all appreciate the here and now and learn from our pasts rather than regret them, and Propter Doc has a detailed and insightful analysis of what she would have changed given her current perspective. Katie at Minor Revisions has a frank and honest essay on regretting the time she has wasted and the questions she should have asked. And comes up with one the most memorable quotes I have heard in a while: "Post-docs are a renewable resource here." and goes on to compare postdocs to plankton. Fabulous and fabulously apt. Ragey One, Apparently and I do have some regrets, Ragey would not have accepted her current position knowing what she knows now, Apparently would have done her postdoc experience differently, and I would have interviewed more.
Dealing with other diverse subjects, other postdoc or former-postdoc bloggers have some great things to say. Sunil at balancing life wonders why Ph.Ds are so long, Incoherently scattered ponderings has some advice for what not to have on a CV and YoungFemaleScientists discusses whether its easier for foreign postdocs to find jobs here as opposed to US postdocs looking elsewhere. Marianne at the Eternal Postdoc tells us why being a postdoc is so hard, and Chall at Dreams and Hopes of a Scientist believes that your PI will find it easier to believe in you when someone else does. Chris at Highly Allochthonous finds that the postdoc is willing but the equipment isn't and a group of postdocs formed the postdoc union (wonder how they are doing?). Also, no to be discriminatory, but I have to mention some lovely women in science, Micella Phoenix DeWhysse at Science Careers has a whole series on Educated Women, here's one, and women in science as always has cool things to say.
And finally, the utterly apt and necessary PostDoc Oath, from the Girl from Ipanema. Say it with me everyone, " I X postdoc, do solemnly swear that..."
It's always a joy to host a carnival where you read things written by your peers that are so insightful, truthful and enjoyable. Thank you everyone who wrote to me with posts and those who suggested posts, and without any further ado, the carnival.
Regrets Regrets
I wanted to know what all of you would have done differently if you could, and the spectrum of answers was fascinating. Dr. Brazen Hussy wouldn't change a thing, barring the occasional drunken quarrels with her advisor. Day by Day wouldn't change much either in the balance, she regrets only not spending enough time with her friends from grad school. Lou proposes that we all appreciate the here and now and learn from our pasts rather than regret them, and Propter Doc has a detailed and insightful analysis of what she would have changed given her current perspective. Katie at Minor Revisions has a frank and honest essay on regretting the time she has wasted and the questions she should have asked. And comes up with one the most memorable quotes I have heard in a while: "Post-docs are a renewable resource here." and goes on to compare postdocs to plankton. Fabulous and fabulously apt. Ragey One, Apparently and I do have some regrets, Ragey would not have accepted her current position knowing what she knows now, Apparently would have done her postdoc experience differently, and I would have interviewed more.
Dealing with other diverse subjects, other postdoc or former-postdoc bloggers have some great things to say. Sunil at balancing life wonders why Ph.Ds are so long, Incoherently scattered ponderings has some advice for what not to have on a CV and YoungFemaleScientists discusses whether its easier for foreign postdocs to find jobs here as opposed to US postdocs looking elsewhere. Marianne at the Eternal Postdoc tells us why being a postdoc is so hard, and Chall at Dreams and Hopes of a Scientist believes that your PI will find it easier to believe in you when someone else does. Chris at Highly Allochthonous finds that the postdoc is willing but the equipment isn't and a group of postdocs formed the postdoc union (wonder how they are doing?). Also, no to be discriminatory, but I have to mention some lovely women in science, Micella Phoenix DeWhysse at Science Careers has a whole series on Educated Women, here's one, and women in science as always has cool things to say.
And finally, the utterly apt and necessary PostDoc Oath, from the Girl from Ipanema. Say it with me everyone, " I X postdoc, do solemnly swear that..."
What would I have done differently?
Interviewed more.
I don't believe in regrets and hand-wringing. I am self-aware enough to know that I made an informed choice and I saw most of the red flags in my current lab when I interviewed. I didn't expect them all to be true, but that is a different matter.
I interviewed over one long weekend, in one area. I did restrict myself geographically for personal reasons, and that geographical restriction is turning out to be the best past of this experience. Anyway, over that weekend, I interviewed with five PIs and three labs. One experience was excellent, saw some potential problems, figured awareness was half the battle. One experience was really good, but I would have ended up being the senior person in the lab and the PI wasn't even directly offering me the job anyway. The other three were washouts. I was already pretty fed up with the process, because I had a few pre-screening rejections based on the tight funds at the time and my average but not sexy CV. So I didn't send out more applications and accepted offer from said excellent interview experience.
Red flags and all. And everything I thought might possibly go wrong did. Everything possible. Which really sucks, but I thought they were all possible. I also think that every lab has its, shall we say, quirks. I didn't expect the personality of the PI and the community of the lab to be this negative. I have some wonderful colleagues, so it makes it easier, but otherwise, not good. And the general research environment is not conducive to one's greater professional development.
So, I made an informed decision and took a chance, it didn't pan out. I'm dealing. But, in restrospect I should have interviewed more, seen more places, other labs, other dynamics and then decided.
Oh well.
I don't believe in regrets and hand-wringing. I am self-aware enough to know that I made an informed choice and I saw most of the red flags in my current lab when I interviewed. I didn't expect them all to be true, but that is a different matter.
I interviewed over one long weekend, in one area. I did restrict myself geographically for personal reasons, and that geographical restriction is turning out to be the best past of this experience. Anyway, over that weekend, I interviewed with five PIs and three labs. One experience was excellent, saw some potential problems, figured awareness was half the battle. One experience was really good, but I would have ended up being the senior person in the lab and the PI wasn't even directly offering me the job anyway. The other three were washouts. I was already pretty fed up with the process, because I had a few pre-screening rejections based on the tight funds at the time and my average but not sexy CV. So I didn't send out more applications and accepted offer from said excellent interview experience.
Red flags and all. And everything I thought might possibly go wrong did. Everything possible. Which really sucks, but I thought they were all possible. I also think that every lab has its, shall we say, quirks. I didn't expect the personality of the PI and the community of the lab to be this negative. I have some wonderful colleagues, so it makes it easier, but otherwise, not good. And the general research environment is not conducive to one's greater professional development.
So, I made an informed decision and took a chance, it didn't pan out. I'm dealing. But, in restrospect I should have interviewed more, seen more places, other labs, other dynamics and then decided.
Oh well.
Thursday, July 26, 2007
Back in Lab in Under 11 Hours
Sighs. It has been a busy couple of weeks, and I have been back in lab in under 9 hours even, the intervening time covering sleep shower and breakfast.
Now that's a good thing. It means I have things to do, it means that there are Experiments in progress. There may even be a Paper coming out of all of this in two years. Hours of endless echoing puke coloured hallways, dirty linoleum, fluorescent strip lighting, latex gloves, laminar flow hoods, the smell of FBS-it's all worth it in the end right? Who would want a squashy couch, hardwood floors, books, food and company instead?
Funnily enough, half the time I don't want the couch etc. instead. Its the postdoc Zone I guess, nothing like the prospect of experiments working to bring one back to the lab. Even though they may only be prospects at this point, a tiny possibility is better than none at all. There's something zen about the eerie echoing hallway, the lab chair fits my spine better than any couch and the world starts to be clearer under those fluorescent lights.
Its the Zone people, the Zone. Research in the zone-let's see how long it goes.
Now that's a good thing. It means I have things to do, it means that there are Experiments in progress. There may even be a Paper coming out of all of this in two years. Hours of endless echoing puke coloured hallways, dirty linoleum, fluorescent strip lighting, latex gloves, laminar flow hoods, the smell of FBS-it's all worth it in the end right? Who would want a squashy couch, hardwood floors, books, food and company instead?
Funnily enough, half the time I don't want the couch etc. instead. Its the postdoc Zone I guess, nothing like the prospect of experiments working to bring one back to the lab. Even though they may only be prospects at this point, a tiny possibility is better than none at all. There's something zen about the eerie echoing hallway, the lab chair fits my spine better than any couch and the world starts to be clearer under those fluorescent lights.
Its the Zone people, the Zone. Research in the zone-let's see how long it goes.
Thursday, July 19, 2007
How to Choose a Postdoc Lab
My cousin has just "defended" his thesis and I was talking to him about what he was planning to do postdoc-wise. It brought back memories of the my own postdoc job search early last year. I was trying to draw on my experiences and be helpful, but as I thought about it more and more, I became less and less coherent. So I decided to put down what I thought here, and see if any of you who have searched for postdoc jobs have any further insight.
There are many things that are good to keep in mind while job hunting and I'm going to the list the things that I think are key, the most important thing to remember is that the job that meets all your criteria does not exist. Period. I would try and identify a few things that would make you most happy and try and have those. The rest, well, deal.
So in no particular order:
1. The two-body problem: This is probably the hardest problem for most; if you are a couple, each invested in their career, you have to move together. You have to align expectations for two different people, possibly at different stages in their career, even two different fields or industries. That said, this is probably the career stage at which the two-body problem is easiest solved since postdoc positions are more frequently available than any other.
2. The place: This is something that mattered a lot to me personally. I went to an undergrad college is the veriest village, and as a result am a total city junkie. Whichever way you go, city, village, out in the country, this is important because if you don't like where you are, life will automatically be more difficult. Also, your milieu is directly related to where you live, whether you meet like-minded people or constantly feel like you have to be circumspect in your interactions with people.
3. The projects: The biggest question, will you have a separate clearly defined project of your own. I cannot emphasize how important this is. Its all very well to agrre with the PI that you will take over X person's project-what if they haven't left by the time you have arrived? Academia is very flexible, and sometimes people prolong their career transitions for long periods of time. So if you don't have a clearly different project, well hone your thumb-twiddling skills. Also, determine before you accept a position which portion of a project is clearly yours. Territorialism is a rampant trait of scientists, protect yourself. What's the point if you have your heart set on a project and join a lab only to find that it has been given away? Discuss this.
4. The P.I.: This is obvious, but anyway. Make sure you can talk to your boss. They do not have to be your friend, and very likely will not take as much care of you as a good Ph.D. mentor, but they should still be respectful and willing to listen to you. Also, different people have different preferences for a boss, but in general my feeling is that a micromanager would be a bad postdoc boss because the whole point of a postdoc is that you become independent. Micromanagers rarely like to set you free.
5. The Lab: Anyone who has ever read a blog knows how much this impacts our lives. Seriously, find at least two people you can get along with, who are going to overlap with you for at least some time. Its hard to be friends with all 15 members of a lab, but all you need is a couple of people you are glad to see everyday. Nature papers are all very well, misery sucks. It really does and working everyday in a lab where you and others are miserable is almost impossibly hard.
6. The Department: There are some really great labs that are one-off labs in their departments. These labs do great work, but you may end up somewhat isolated in your department. The departmental seminars will not deal with your work, you will not be able to network with people in your field, which you absolutely need to do if you want to stay in academia. On a more day-to-day basis, you won't have any one but your lab to talk to about your work. And that may not always work out well.
7. The prospects for funding independent of the boss: Funding sets you free. Postdoctoral fellowships are a boon, as soon as you have one, your life improves in so many ways. Your boss will be thrilled not to pay your salary (the single biggest expense in most Biology labs), you demonstrate that you can write fund-able proposals , you feel good about yourself , and most fellowships pay above average postdoc salaries.
8. The Nature of the Actual Work: For example, brain cancer research sounds so cool. But, how would you feel about dissecting out mouse brains on a daily basis? Injecting things into a mouse's skull? Evaluating mouse health based on how much pain they are in? Or else, would you be dreadfully bored pipetting 30 96-well plates a day for real time PCR or screening X or Y? Think about it. Lab work is icky, is it beyond your ick threshold?
9. The Portability of the research: Would your future boss be willing to give away part of your project to you should you want to leave and start your own group? Most bosses should be aware of this possibility and be open to it, what you should do is communicate! I cannot emphasize that too much.
10. The salary and benefits: She surely jests, you must be thinking. Well, partly, but there are actually places where postdocs get both competitive pay and decent benefits. If you have children or loans or are sick of being on the lower end of the pay scale, think about it and look for places that pay better.
11. The Language: Seriously, even in the USA as a native English speaker, cconsider what is the native language of the lab. Why make yourself an outsider?
12. Children or not? If you're considering having them, sound out your future boss and talk to current lab members about their child-bearing related experiences.
13. The Weather? If this is a big criterion, re-consider you career choice carefully.
14. The Prospects for alternative careers: Not all postdocs become faculty, anyone can try to do the math. Many of us who embark on a postdoc do so in the full expectation (hope?) of succeeding and becoming PIs. Doesn't always happen. So be prepared. I'm not saying one should anticipate failure, but on case you decide to change career tracks, you should be in an environment that lets you. Teaching opportunities, writing editing and publishing, the biotech industry, these are all things you should try to get exposure to.
This has turned into an incredibly long post, so I'm going to stop here. There are a lot of things that go into making a career decision, and these are some of the things that I think are important to think about while deciding where to postdoc. Ph.D to postdoc is the easiest career transition one can make, everyone wants postdocs, they are cheap, smart and young. Its important to spend some energy on this choice because it impacts where you end up next, not to mention your general mental health.
In the end though, a job is a job is a job (next post), and wherever you end up, if you don't work at the job for whatever reason, it won't go very well. So good luck, congratulations on graduating and welcome to mad wonderful world of postdocs.
There are many things that are good to keep in mind while job hunting and I'm going to the list the things that I think are key, the most important thing to remember is that the job that meets all your criteria does not exist. Period. I would try and identify a few things that would make you most happy and try and have those. The rest, well, deal.
So in no particular order:
1. The two-body problem: This is probably the hardest problem for most; if you are a couple, each invested in their career, you have to move together. You have to align expectations for two different people, possibly at different stages in their career, even two different fields or industries. That said, this is probably the career stage at which the two-body problem is easiest solved since postdoc positions are more frequently available than any other.
2. The place: This is something that mattered a lot to me personally. I went to an undergrad college is the veriest village, and as a result am a total city junkie. Whichever way you go, city, village, out in the country, this is important because if you don't like where you are, life will automatically be more difficult. Also, your milieu is directly related to where you live, whether you meet like-minded people or constantly feel like you have to be circumspect in your interactions with people.
3. The projects: The biggest question, will you have a separate clearly defined project of your own. I cannot emphasize how important this is. Its all very well to agrre with the PI that you will take over X person's project-what if they haven't left by the time you have arrived? Academia is very flexible, and sometimes people prolong their career transitions for long periods of time. So if you don't have a clearly different project, well hone your thumb-twiddling skills. Also, determine before you accept a position which portion of a project is clearly yours. Territorialism is a rampant trait of scientists, protect yourself. What's the point if you have your heart set on a project and join a lab only to find that it has been given away? Discuss this.
4. The P.I.: This is obvious, but anyway. Make sure you can talk to your boss. They do not have to be your friend, and very likely will not take as much care of you as a good Ph.D. mentor, but they should still be respectful and willing to listen to you. Also, different people have different preferences for a boss, but in general my feeling is that a micromanager would be a bad postdoc boss because the whole point of a postdoc is that you become independent. Micromanagers rarely like to set you free.
5. The Lab: Anyone who has ever read a blog knows how much this impacts our lives. Seriously, find at least two people you can get along with, who are going to overlap with you for at least some time. Its hard to be friends with all 15 members of a lab, but all you need is a couple of people you are glad to see everyday. Nature papers are all very well, misery sucks. It really does and working everyday in a lab where you and others are miserable is almost impossibly hard.
6. The Department: There are some really great labs that are one-off labs in their departments. These labs do great work, but you may end up somewhat isolated in your department. The departmental seminars will not deal with your work, you will not be able to network with people in your field, which you absolutely need to do if you want to stay in academia. On a more day-to-day basis, you won't have any one but your lab to talk to about your work. And that may not always work out well.
7. The prospects for funding independent of the boss: Funding sets you free. Postdoctoral fellowships are a boon, as soon as you have one, your life improves in so many ways. Your boss will be thrilled not to pay your salary (the single biggest expense in most Biology labs), you demonstrate that you can write fund-able proposals , you feel good about yourself , and most fellowships pay above average postdoc salaries.
8. The Nature of the Actual Work: For example, brain cancer research sounds so cool. But, how would you feel about dissecting out mouse brains on a daily basis? Injecting things into a mouse's skull? Evaluating mouse health based on how much pain they are in? Or else, would you be dreadfully bored pipetting 30 96-well plates a day for real time PCR or screening X or Y? Think about it. Lab work is icky, is it beyond your ick threshold?
9. The Portability of the research: Would your future boss be willing to give away part of your project to you should you want to leave and start your own group? Most bosses should be aware of this possibility and be open to it, what you should do is communicate! I cannot emphasize that too much.
10. The salary and benefits: She surely jests, you must be thinking. Well, partly, but there are actually places where postdocs get both competitive pay and decent benefits. If you have children or loans or are sick of being on the lower end of the pay scale, think about it and look for places that pay better.
11. The Language: Seriously, even in the USA as a native English speaker, cconsider what is the native language of the lab. Why make yourself an outsider?
12. Children or not? If you're considering having them, sound out your future boss and talk to current lab members about their child-bearing related experiences.
13. The Weather? If this is a big criterion, re-consider you career choice carefully.
14. The Prospects for alternative careers: Not all postdocs become faculty, anyone can try to do the math. Many of us who embark on a postdoc do so in the full expectation (hope?) of succeeding and becoming PIs. Doesn't always happen. So be prepared. I'm not saying one should anticipate failure, but on case you decide to change career tracks, you should be in an environment that lets you. Teaching opportunities, writing editing and publishing, the biotech industry, these are all things you should try to get exposure to.
This has turned into an incredibly long post, so I'm going to stop here. There are a lot of things that go into making a career decision, and these are some of the things that I think are important to think about while deciding where to postdoc. Ph.D to postdoc is the easiest career transition one can make, everyone wants postdocs, they are cheap, smart and young. Its important to spend some energy on this choice because it impacts where you end up next, not to mention your general mental health.
In the end though, a job is a job is a job (next post), and wherever you end up, if you don't work at the job for whatever reason, it won't go very well. So good luck, congratulations on graduating and welcome to mad wonderful world of postdocs.
Wednesday, June 20, 2007
Responsibility
Sometimes responsibility is the only thing that keeps me going.
I was a good kid, a reasonable teenager, and a successful college student. I wasn't particularly virtuous or hard-working, I was just really responsible. I always felt responsibility weigh heavily.
Now I am a postdoc, and not too thrilled with the state of my professional life. I feel like I am pushed to work on something that just doesn't interest me, I do not enjoy the nitty gritty daily grind of the lab work I do, I fell that my abilities are not adequately appreciated let alone compensated, and I feel that I am not being given enough other opportunities, such as reviews and writing. Yet I keep going. Sometimes it is the small part of my project I enjoy, sometimes it is the thrill of research, of finding out something new, sometimes it is just ambition, visa status or inertia, but mostly what keeps me trudging onwards (and upwards? outwards?) is an over-developed sense of responsibility.
I feel a responsibility to my employer, despite what I think I do not get in return. I feel a responsibility to my Ph.D. boss and lab because my success reflects on them (and terrible guilt on behalf of all the mice that were sacrificed along the way). I feel responsible to my future husband because I rooted him out of a place he loved to move here. I don't want to let my family or my country (really) down. Most of all though, I feel this immense responsibility to myself. I have spent so much time working towards this, so much effort. I have heard to many times that I have potential, and dammit, I want to fulfill it. I owe myself that. I am responsible to myself for the person I am and the person I will become, and giving up is not a part of that person.
So I go responsibly on, and if it wasn't for that aggravating rational-state-that-shall-not-be named, I would have quit a while ago. At least I think so, who knows, maybe ambition and inertia are sufficient. In any case, my responsibilities are here to stay, and I am made that way. And maybe that's enough. After all research requires persistence and luck above all, and who cares what motivates the persistence. Does it matter that it is responsibility? In my case it appears to be enough, so why not. Its as good a way as any to keep going.
I think.
scientiae-carnival
I was a good kid, a reasonable teenager, and a successful college student. I wasn't particularly virtuous or hard-working, I was just really responsible. I always felt responsibility weigh heavily.
Now I am a postdoc, and not too thrilled with the state of my professional life. I feel like I am pushed to work on something that just doesn't interest me, I do not enjoy the nitty gritty daily grind of the lab work I do, I fell that my abilities are not adequately appreciated let alone compensated, and I feel that I am not being given enough other opportunities, such as reviews and writing. Yet I keep going. Sometimes it is the small part of my project I enjoy, sometimes it is the thrill of research, of finding out something new, sometimes it is just ambition, visa status or inertia, but mostly what keeps me trudging onwards (and upwards? outwards?) is an over-developed sense of responsibility.
I feel a responsibility to my employer, despite what I think I do not get in return. I feel a responsibility to my Ph.D. boss and lab because my success reflects on them (and terrible guilt on behalf of all the mice that were sacrificed along the way). I feel responsible to my future husband because I rooted him out of a place he loved to move here. I don't want to let my family or my country (really) down. Most of all though, I feel this immense responsibility to myself. I have spent so much time working towards this, so much effort. I have heard to many times that I have potential, and dammit, I want to fulfill it. I owe myself that. I am responsible to myself for the person I am and the person I will become, and giving up is not a part of that person.
So I go responsibly on, and if it wasn't for that aggravating rational-state-that-shall-not-be named, I would have quit a while ago. At least I think so, who knows, maybe ambition and inertia are sufficient. In any case, my responsibilities are here to stay, and I am made that way. And maybe that's enough. After all research requires persistence and luck above all, and who cares what motivates the persistence. Does it matter that it is responsibility? In my case it appears to be enough, so why not. Its as good a way as any to keep going.
I think.
scientiae-carnival
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)